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Tournament of Mortals: Dr. Who vs Incredible Hulk

Author's note : Here is the undisrupted, uncut version of my fight from facebook. I hope you enjoy. 

She's ordering you to read her fanfics, the one about ponies

Princess Azula of the Fire Nation reviewed the data on the next fight; the Doctor vs. the Hulk. Azula scoffed at this match. A big dumb brute versus a vulgar commoner. As far as she was concerned, the Doctor was nothing more than a do-gooder with an ego the size of the Earth Kingdom.

The Doctor’s own impulsiveness and ego would be his Achilles heel. She’d read about his defeat and victory at demons’ run. He was no more an oncoming storm, no more a god than a damn cockroach. Then her musing was interrupted by Tai-Lee

She can kill you twenty different ways, but there are rocks in the earth kingdom that are smarter than her

“Oh, I love the bow tie that little man wears. It’s so cute,” gushed the pink clad acrobat and martial artist. “But should he be called the Doctor?”

Azula rolled her eyes. Tai-Lee was one of the only friends Azula had in the world; she was loyal, useful and the intellectual equal of the Avatar’s pet sky bison.

“I mean, he could be called the Physician, the M.D, The Healer or the Dentist even.”

In the corner of the room, Azula’s other friend Mai lounged. The emo fire nation girl was much the same as ever. “Uh,” she sighed, “This is so boring. All we do is practice. We don’t even get to kill or maim anyone.”

Behold the rare East-Asian emo

Azula turned to Mai and frowned, “You know, I’m not your mother. If you’re bored, read a book, do some painting, get something to eat, or slit your wrists; I don’t really care.”

Mai sneered back at Azula and gave her the Fire Nation equivalent to the middle finger salute.

Azula sneered back and turned to Tai-Lee, “Well enough of the Doctor and the green brute. We have to prepare for my upcoming match with either Rogue or Raven.” To emphasize the point, Azula activated the lightsabre she’d taken from Galen Marek.

Tai-Lee started to hop up and down with excitement. She probably had an idea; Azula cringed when she remembered the last time her bubbly friend had an idea. “What is it, Tai-Lee?’ asked an exasperated Azula.

“Oh! Oh! Oh! When you win the Tournament, do you think that you can make me a giant? Or better yet! Can you make me a giant with flowers?”

Azula considered this unusual request. “Sure . . . why not.”

Friends: were they always like this?